Tonight we took Dad out to dinner. He hasn't been out to a restaurant in a long time and it was really fun for him. After dinner I asked if we could swing by Mom's grave sight. We drove up to the cemetery and immediately we missed our Mom. I just want this joke to be over and things to return to normal. The sun started to set right above her spot covered with flowers. It was really beautiful. My Dad was extremely sad but he seemed to feel at peace. We all wish we could take away his pain.
Each night is tough for me personally. My Dad is more sad in the mornings when he wakes up alone in his room. Each day we find something to do to occupy our time. We're going to be ok. It will just take some time.
We love you Mom!! We miss you!
9 comments:
I miss her more than words can say.
I'm not sure how we are supposed to do this??? I feel lost.
What do we do now? I plan to come to mom's on Monday at noon...icky Mexican place anyone???
I'm in - Mand!!
Salsa in a ketchup bottle, who can resist???
See you there!
Oh Josh. I'm so glad you wrote! I have so missed this. I have looked for you every day! You know I love you all! Please keep me updated. I so know how you all must be hurting because I've been doing this on my own for the last week. All I can tell you is keep writing! It's my lifeline!
Love you all! Barbie
Susan called me this week and said, "I can't do this, I miss her so." We are all right there with you, Josh!
Such a loss. I am sure it is hard to even put into words. We are still thinking of your family and will continue our prayers.
To all the members of the Dorius family: Unfortunately I have a fairly good feel where you all are with your emotions at this time. I would like to pass on some suggestions that may help you through this difficult time. I am sure you will agree with me that it is difficult to explain to someone the powerful feelings of emptiness and pain that you are experiencing. Kathy and Earl were such great friends of Dellene's and mine for almost thirty years and I want to continue that friendship with you Earl until it is our time to go. I found it has helped me a great deal to dwell on the great memories and all the good times we had and how thankful I am for that. I am so glad I got to spend some time with Kathy a week before she passed away. As I mentioned, there are so many great memories of things we did in the past such as boating on Lake Powell, the dinner parties we had at our homes and most of all I remember the first time Dellene and I met Kathy and Earl. We had just moved to Hollyhock Hill from California in October of 1979 and that Christmas, Kathy had organized a Christmas Carolling event and we went around the neighborhood singing..off note... and it was so foggy we could hardly see across the street! We finally stumbled our way through the ordeal and ended up at the Dorius' for hot drinks. I will always remember and cherish that moment. These are the memories that you have to dwell on to help you through the difficult periods.
I have had some help from a counsler and it is helping me through my ordeal. I would like to pass on some suggestions that may be of help to you. I was told that you can measure your progress by certain feelings and behaviors. You will know you are feeling better and making progress as your sense of humor returns and you find yourself laughing more. You are making progress when you find your mood swings are not so high and so low and you can feel the time lengthen between meltdowns. I had guilt feelings about this at first but was told that that is normal and not to be concerned. I would like to share with all of you an excerpt from the writings of the author Earl Grollman which was passed on to me. I found great solace in this.
"You may not have completely
regained your balance.
Yet life continues though scars remain.
You are breathing, moving and functioning.
You are now able to remember the one you loved and the circumstances surrounding the death
without falling apart...
You have changed. You have grown.
I would like to mention what a lovely service you had for Kathy. What a great tribute. I know she would have been so proud of her sons and daughters and Earl, and rightly so.
Earl, when you feel up to it, I would like to go fly fishing with you as you had suggested. You will have to teach me and please be patient as I am a slow learner when it comes to fishing!
Keep strong and may God bless you.
As always, Don Furlong
I am so glad you guys have each other to go through this with, and know that so many of us are praying and thinking of you all. We love you guys.
ps. just to make you smile...
Don't forget that Adam is his best friend's mother. ;)
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